I almost forgot to write today! And when I did remember, while getting ready for bed, I almost decided to skip it. I have reason enough.

Today was my graduation ceremony. Not an event I was terribly eager to attend – stepping out on stages in my condition does not come easily; and since I went part-time and stretched the 4-year course into 5, I didn’t know my classmates all that well. I spent my 1st 3 years of school, the most formative ones, with the graduating class of 2018. So there was no one here I really felt I needed to see. Also, I didn’t have any good ideas about what to do for food. However, my parents (and grandparents) were not to be cheated out of their day of celebration. It started at 1:30, so I didn’t think I’d have any problem getting home with lots of time to write a blog post before my 7:00 conference meeting. There were only about 120 students in my graduating class – how long could the ceremony be?

Turns out, it can be pretty long. Add in a reception afterwards – though I can’t complain about that, it was beautiful and the food was delicious and there was almost nothing there that I couldn’t eat, which took a lot of stress off me – and downtown Toronto traffic at 5:00 pm, and an accident on the 400 north… I was 20 minutes late for that conference call.

I made it through that conference call, and went to the washroom to finally take out my contacts. Only to discover that there was a reason my eyes kept tearing up through that ceremony: I have officially entered the world of conjunctivitis – commonly known as pink eye. The childhood disease I never had has struck me down in my old age. And I can now officially make that diagnosis, because – well, take a look at this.

That’s right. You can all refer to me as Dr. Gibson now 🙂

I am not, however, licensed to practice medicine in any jurisdiction. I have some major exams to write, first. Still – I didn’t think this piece of paper would make me so happy. I can hardly stop looking at it.

It took a lot of work to get here. It was an experience I wasn’t expecting, and one I will never forget. It taught me many things. The person I am now is very different from the one who enrolled in this program 5 years ago.

So, as tired as I am, and as much as I know – as my own doctor – that I need sleep in order for my immune system to effectively fight this infection off, I am a little too excited to just go to bed. I wanted to write.

So, what thoughts do I have to share with you tonight? What wisdom have I gleaned from this experience? I’m not sure. Celebrate your accomplishments? Hard work pays off in the end? Nothing so philosophical. I don’t know if 5 years of work really was worth it, yet. All I know is that today, I am happy.

I am happy. I didn’t need to eat, to be happy. At this moment, I don’t even need to be thin – or healthy – to be happy. Tomorrow, I will have to go right back to the grinding work of studying. I will have to step on the scale in the morning and face whatever it has to say to me. I will probably still be cold, and I know I’m going to be tired. Nothing material has really changed. Life is what it is – difficult, and demanding, and sometimes disappointing.

But right now, I am really, really, really happy. Those 5 years, whatever they were, were for something. I have proof of that. I did not accomplish my main goal – to heal myself. But I got something out of it. This moment of happiness, for one. And I have a feeling there will be more to come.

Day 31: A Piece of Paper
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One thought on “Day 31: A Piece of Paper

  • May 24, 2019 at 8:20 am

    Oh yes my dear Carla. There is much more to come. Relishing the moment of happiness you experienced was worth it after all. I can see that you showed up for it. You were present. If you ever listen to Eckhart Tolle he continually reiterates all of life experience is made up of moments. Just this moment, then the next strung together . You & I are continually creating our lives. I am so happy for you Carla. Talk about ?…..I cried when I read this blog. Happiness is being fully awake for each moment for that is all we have. Lots of love, hugs & congratulations Dr. Gibson.
    I also see that you have a handle on reality….carry on with chopping wood & carrying water….for daily life is such. Sharing this moment with loved ones makes it so much sweeter. And thank you for sharing your joy with us Dr. Gibson.


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